The Origins of Tonky And Titch (T&T)
During my school years, I remember there were a couple of boys who stood out. One was Simon Tonkinson, who will forever be remembered as "the kid who wore shorts" in another blog The Last Of The Fags. And the other was Karl Hudson, whose diminutive height and build and propensity to tell exaggerated stories earned him the name of "Titchanory" and word derived from combining "Titch" and "Jackanory", the children's TV programme. Hudson's cause was not helped by his turned up nose or piggy snout which made him look akin to Pinocchio.
Left to right: Karl Hudson, Simon Tonkinson and Richard Hill circe1975
Between all the lessons and homework, I found time to write hundreds of episodes of a mini cartoon about the two (Tonky and Titch) and their exploits. These exploits were usually about Tonkinson's excessive masturbation, of which he regularly boasted "I did it five times last night" and Titch's tall stories "I went fishing with my dad last weekend and I caught a pike that was six feet long".
They also included when appropriate, other school mates and teachers such as:
Simon has since become a successful IT executive in North America. Karl, however, is still the obnoxious little wanker he used to be, but now lives with his life partner, Alfonso, in Burnham on Sea (near Bristol) None of my copies of Tonky and Titch remain, but I do believe that over the Atlantic in a large house there, there lurks a pile of T&Ts.
(Masters):
Slug Dolman, Beefy Bullock, Snot Williams, HG Williams, Toad Cameron, Toad's daughter Heather Cameron, Satan Hebden, Johnny Flatt, Pufter Sadler, Taffy Hingley, Yogi Bealt, Neddy Bacon, Granny Bradshaw, Molly Anderson, Miss one and a half (tits were disproportionate) Credgington (became Mrs Simpson), Drain Pipe, The Radiator Zebic, Froggy Glauert, Wanker Wainwright, Basher Coreless, Archie Moore, Ringo Pinney, Pete Anstey, Doc Martin, Gump Jones, Nobby Clarke....
(Fellow schoolies):
Geoff "Gumboil" Goodman, Perry "Pezza" Bailey, Phil "Gary Glitter" Finney (when GG was a glam rocker and not a known paedo), Ken "Gnasher" Trapp, Dave "Snooks" Wilson, Greg "Count Caviar" Smith, Stuart "Botty Bum Buggerer" Clark, Simon "Sucker" Smith, Toby "Whitey" Minton, Neil "Nelly" Yule, Dave "The Nose" Gerson, Adrian "Paddy" Grogan, Taimur "Taz" Tariq, Richie "Slade" Hill, Austen "Ozzie" Gower, Richard "Chico" Phillips, Marty "Silver Tooth" Cobley, Andy "Wank-Stain" Harris and me Robert "Bob" De Bilde...
Simon has since become a successful IT executive in North America. Karl, however, is still the obnoxious little wanker he used to be, but now lives with his life partner, Alfonso, in Burnham on Sea (near Bristol) None of my copies of Tonky and Titch remain, but I do believe that over the Atlantic in a large house there, there lurks a pile of T&Ts.
